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23.2.09

Cult (2007)



Director: Joe Knee
Starring: Rachel Miner, Taryn Manning
Unrated Running time: 85 minutes
Released by Maverick Entertainment

CULT begins with a double prologue that tells the story of a Chinese girl who is murdered by her father after it is discovered that she has become pregnant out of wedlock. The murdered girl wore an amulet, which is believed to possess magical powers. We jump forward in time - a group of smoking hot women in their underwear are gathered together. They are members of a cult that worships the slain China woman, and are performing an eye-gouging ritual to invoke the powers of the amulet. The cult's robe wearing leader has other ideas and stabs all of the babes just as the ritual reaches its climax.

We finally land at a modern-day college campus, where a plucky young student (Rachel Miner) and her friends are researching the amulet, the curse, and the cult for a school project. All sorts of spooky crap begins happening before we even know what the hell is going on. Lots of hard-to-believe things start to happen, and people start turning up dead in even harder-to-believe ways. Obviously, the group's school project is to blame for all of this trouble, yet Miner's character can't stop her research. It turns out her mom was one of the poked-out-eye babes from the second part of the prologue.
Terrible music cues, seasick camera work, and dialogue that runs the gamut between stupid and retarded are all in abundance here. Factor in a confusing story and bad special effects, and CULT adds up to one dumb, and worst of all, and boring movie.

I almost felt bad for star Rachel Miner (Penny Dreadful). She is a decent actress in a film that is four kinds of awful. Then I discovered the film's estimated budget: 950,000 dollars! Since very little of that money seems to have gone into the filming or production of this atrocity, I hope Miner at least got a healthy paycheck out of it.

1 out of 5.



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